Julia stood scanning the room, looking for her friend, whom she momentarily misplaced.
“Hey! Robert! Hey. How are you?”
Robert made a hilarious face. Julia laughed for a bit at the face.
“I did a ton of coke this weekend.”
Robert did not approve of this behavior, Julia knew as soon as she said it. As they talked at the bar, Julia thought to herself “people like you better when you are just nice. just be nice.”
Julia thought about going home and slitting her wrists. Not in a serious way, just to distract herself from the mounting anxiety of the evening. Julia has never been one to keep many friends. Generally, Julia prefers to be alone, with occasional lovers.
Robert told Julia all about his weekend. He spent it with a new friend name Evelyn. Evelyn was very pretty and closer to Robert’s age then Julia. Julia was a few years older than Robert.
“Yeah, I think you’re now my second favorite girl in Brooklyn.”
Julia faked a laugh and stared at the floor. The conversation continued.
“my friends are assholes,” Julia thought to herself.
“my friends are assholes,” Julia thought again.
“my friends are assholes, my friends are assholes,” Julia continued to think.
Julia looked at Robert’s face. It was young and sweet. Robert pet Julia on the arm with his elbow, because he did not feel like setting down his drink, but sensed he was being an asshole. Julia liked that Robert had been very affectionate with her since they very first met. Often Robert head butts Julia, and they can be seen stepping on each other’s toes at subway stations regularly.
“my friends are assholes,” Julia continued to think.
Julia had recently had a falling out with a girl friend. There had been some noticeable tenseness for a while, then one day there was a trivial argument about whether or not it was creepy that a mutual friend shaved his arm pits, which snowballed into the end of a short but very close friendship. Julia’s girl friend had a history of doing this to people close to her, she assumed it was going to happen to her as well eventually. Julia does not enjoy making a scene about things, so she let the friendship go without much of a fight. No fuss at all. Even still, Julia felt confused and rejected and often thought about texting her now ex friend, whom she missed a little. But the stress of dealing with another high maintenance relationship kept her from ever hitting ‘send.’
Robert and Julia greeted a few friends who were also at the bar. The two got up from their seats and found a table to sit at that was close to the stage, where a few poets were reading that night. They sat and talked and waited for their friend Joe. The reading started shortly. Joe had not arrived and Julia worried a bit that he might not be coming at all. Julia was very fond of Joe, but never really felt that he was fond of her. Their friendship was enjoyable for her, but she frequently questioned why he wanted to be friends with her.
Joe arrived and sat with Julia and Robert. Julia and Robert ate cashews and played footsie under the table. Joe sat close to Julia. She felt his arm against her arm. Julia subtly moved closer to Joe, pressing her warm arm into his a little more. Julia then put her leg up on Robert’s lap. Julia had a near constant craving for physical contact. Many people avoided Julia because she was prone to reaching out and touching heads for no reason.
“my friends are assholes.”
After the reading was over, Joe and Julia introduced themselves to a writer they enjoyed listening to. It went well as it usually does between Joe and Julia, because Joe was talented and famous, and Julia was pretty and aggressive. Julia was not actually so pretty, but had gotten very good at applying make up, and dressing in such a way that it was not visible that she was no longer skinny.
“second favorite girl in brooklyn, my friends are assholes,” Julia thought.
After the reading Julia, Robert, Joe and Joe’s roommate, Mike, went to get food. Julia talked to Mike and stared at the ground while they walked around Manhattan. Julia wanted very badly to go home, be alone, and masturbate before she went to sleep.
Julia was a lot of people’s second favorite girl in Brooklyn.