Thursday, January 24, 2008

Call For Interns

Hello. I need an intern at the TV production company I work for. You will be my personal bitch, but I will bestow my benevolence on you. Hours are flexible. Must live in the New York area (and be cute- jews preferred {gay blondes acceptable as well}). If any one is interested, please email me.

P.S. We will be in production on feature film this summer. Interns will be allowed to breath our air if they prove their worth in the office.

P.P.S. I am not joking. If you want to get involved in film/tv, this is an awesome way to do it. I started at my company as someone's personal bitch, and I only have a few scars on my lower left leg, and now I get a nice pay check.

P.P.P.S. Photo required.

NEEDED SKILLS
_______________

* ability to read
* ability to punch holes in paper
* an understanding of how to operate a three ring binder
* strong butt and legs
* rich parents/student loans/another job because we will not be paying you at first
* ability to click a mouse
* experience working on a mac
* have watched TV at least once in your life
* ability to catch bats with your teeth
* ability to not talk back
* ability to guess what your superiors are thinking at all times
* six sense-like knowledge of where to get coffee in local area
* strong butt and legs
* no girlfriend/boyfriend (unless they are open to threesomes {also cute})
* drivers license
* not be fucking stupid
* no outstanding warrants (a record is okay, sometimes preferred)
* has cellular phone
* strong butt and legs
* must be 18 years of age or older

1 comment:

Mugur said...

I don't know if it's too late. But I am a cute 21 yr. old Jew...did I mention I am cute.